Lead Yourself First

"A leader has the vision and conviction that a dream can be achieved. He inspires the power and energy to get it done." — Ralph Lauren, Fashion designer

Do you know yourself, really know yourself?

It isn't good enough to see yourself through your filters. How do others see you? How do you know? When was your last 360 feedback? How open are you to feedback?  

Are you present in the moment? 

When you interact with your teams, are you listening? Or are you checking your phone or allowing your mind to wander to your conversation with the CEO this morning?

How true to yourself are you? What does it mean to be authentic? 

The dictionary describes authentic as being genuine and original. It could also mean being true and trustworthy. Bottom line, any way you look at it, it comes across positively. Who wouldn't want to be authentic? 

Yet, we see people all the time that are being more fake than real. Take the loud pitchman on TV, the opinion journalist pretending to present facts,  the presenter/speaker performing instead of giving useful content, or recall the junior high teenage classmate who pretended to like you and then moved on after you had served your usefulness. 

How did that make you feel; not appreciated, used, ignored, and invisible? What do you think stops people from being authentic? 

I suspect fear – fear of not being accepted, fear of being criticized. Or, perhaps, fear of failure.

Only you can decide if you will continue letting fear of any sort dictate your future growth. If you want to move on and be successful, you can't let fear stop you from being who you are meant to be. Like the lyrics in "Let it go"…

It's time to see what I can do
To test the limits and breakthrough
No right, no wrong, no rules for me,
I'm free!

There is a reason that the song was and is still so popular with young women. It is a compelling concept.

Do you make the time to engage with your peers, with your team, with your friends, and your family? 

You may be shocked to hear the percentage of "engaged" workers in the U.S. I was disappointed when I learned the most recent number is 4 percent lower than in 2021.  Those who are involved in, enthusiastic about, and committed to their work and workplace -- are now only 32%.

Before focusing further on your employees, it's a good idea to take a step back and shine a light on yourself.

What about you as a leader? How engaged are you?

It is impossible to engage your employees if you are not engaged. 

Who do you turn to when you need help? 

It is not a sign of weakness to have or need a mentor/coach. We all need a safe person to lean on.

What examples do you leave accidentally or purposefully? Do you preach work-life balance but answer emails all night and expect others to do the same?

If you are a workaholic, you are not necessarily engaged. Engagement is about discretionary time and how you use it. Your life does not have to revolve around work. Find other interests you enjoy.

Do you know your priorities and honor them? What time do you make for yourself or not? 

Making time for yourself is a powerful personal trait. It tells people around you, "I want to take care of myself so I can be there for you and enjoy the time we spend together."

Taking a little time for yourself also refreshes and re-energizes you. It allows you to think more clearly and make better decisions. Taking "me" time also builds your self-esteem as you realize you are important and deserve little time. Don't apologize for asking for and taking what you need.  

What inspires you? What makes you proud? What is your vision for yourself? 

"To serve as a leader, live a balanced life, and apply ethical principles to make a significant difference" – Denise Morrison, CEO of Campbell Soup

When Denise Morrison reached the top at Campbell Soup Company in August 2011, she had few female peers in the upper ranks of the largest companies in the United States.

Reflecting on her career in an interview with The New York Times before her retirement, Ms. Morrison said she "wanted to break the glass ceiling" regardless of the obstacles. "It wasn't only about me," she added. "It was about the next generation of women coming behind me."

How do you want to be remembered? How do you envision your life?

Before Oprah Winfrey became the famous TV personality she is today, she envisioned herself as an inspirational teacher. Her personal mission statement was:

"To be a teacher. And to be known for inspiring my students to be more than they thought they could be."

She may not have become a teacher in the traditional sense but there is no denying that she inspired millions to reach beyond their dreams.

At the end of the day, one can ask themselves what difference will something you do today make for tomorrow.?  

What is the one step you can take toward your vision?

Only you know the answers to these questions. It helps to find a partner to share in exploring these questions and dig beyond the surface – be it a life partner, good friend, trusted colleague, or a coach. 

For a confidential and complimentary discussion on how coaching can help you discover your vision and goals - Let's Talk!

We will continue our discussion next week by guiding you in defining your organizational vision and mission. 

Until next week!

Mary

Tech People Leadership Lessons are sponsored by ITeffectivity.com – an IT Executive Coaching and Advisory practice targeting the technology leaders' challenge of leading and delivering business solutions focusing on effective people and process capabilities. Schedule time with me to further this week's conversation, and Let's Talk!